Monday, May 4, 2009

Rethinking things

Shortly after leaving Calvary Kids Care, I was tipped off to a job opening by a friend. I did not apply for the job. My reasoning was that it would be dishonest for me to apply for a full time job when I was devoted to entering pro baseball. And I was right. But I made the wrong decision.

Wisdom would have told me that I needed a good deal of seasoning before unleashing my raw talent and love for the game on some poor, unsuspecting scout, and several did try to say the same, but I didn't listen. The result is a bank account going backwards in a bad economy. My integrity is intact, but my decision-making isn't.

Now, some good has come out of it, to be sure, including many divine appointments for evangelism (just had one again this morning when I went to try to get my phone turned on; didn't happen, because of a system changeover, but maybe tomorrow) and some much needed information gathering during the poorly-concocted showcase in Ft Lauderdale. In fact, I am certain that I will make a better showing in the much-cheaper, much-closer one-day tryout that is being held in Clearwater May 23, but I am not going to use it to hang my hat.

Fortunately, May 23 is a Saturday, meaning that if I get a job using my best skills, I probably won't have to take off in order to go. Also, by only using it as a barometer, I can commit to a full-time job.

But that means I still need my phone.

In the meantime, I thank God for all of you who have prayed for me and even given to me over the past year or so since I began this journey of entering cross-cultural missions. That is still my goal. How I get to it, whether baseball or not, is the part of God's plan that is yet unknown to me. Baseball will likely take another year to enter, and, if cross-cultural missions means skipping it, I will. I do love the game, but I did put it on the shelf when I moved here, and I will do it again if necessary.

I do plan to practice and play as opportunities show themselves, not only to get the experience, but also to be available to minister to different people. Matt Vandiver is one reason that I have a hard time regretting going to Ft Lauderdale, even as badly as it has turned out. To go from wondering if I were the only Christian among the 60 there to having a solid, much-encouraged brother on my side, to watch his countenance go from fear of man to courage in God, was -- yes, I know this statement will be controversial -- well worth the nearly $1000 it has cost me (so far). Now I do not plan to repeat this sort of decision making in the future, but I do want to take the time to display the real life decisions that I have to make before those that I have asked to pray for me.

So, go ahead, and think me a fool. But please pray for me that I will become wiser. And thank you for reading this.

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